the big Fuzz. big ups to all you mamas.

So yeah...this little pickle is 7 months old today. 

Her squidgy frown lines have popped out. she smiles and giggles and knows how to squeal with the best of them. 
Her favourite food so far is sour apples and her first word was Dad.
She sits up by herself...but seems to be taking after her biggest blister and isn't too fussed about moving anywhere by herself anytime soon.
She smiles as everyone and kisses you back.
She waves and says ta-ta.
She hasn't said Mum yet...although i know she wants to ;)


Today got me thinking. i still haven't moved out of the 'fuzz' yet. you know, that fuzz you live in for the first wee while of motherhood. the tired, forgetful, clumsy(er), emotional, everything is an effort fuzz.
the other two i was well back up an running by 3 months. not necessarily my 'old' self. but a new improved self.
that still hasn't happened after having Daisy.
i still have no energy. and everything is heavy. 


i am happy...don't get me wrong. 
i just don't feel as though my tank is full enough to do everything in a day.


the school run, then the kindy run, then nap times for Daisy.
the washing, the housework, the making dinner, the making sure everyone has everything they need, the finding time for myself (which generally means staying up late staring into space with a cup of tea) the doing it all by myself a lot of nights as Lars has band practice or is at the gym (which i know he needs to do...but sometimes can't help by feel resentful about at times)


i went into having number three with so much energy..with the words from sooo many mothers that going from having 2-3 kiddos was a walk in the park. i felt as though i knew what i was in for...but as much as i obviously wouldn't change it for the world, it has kicked me is the arse.


this is not about sympathy...as i have made these choices and i do love most of my life. but the truth is it's hard. really hard.
and i'm not even 30 yet! 


i just wanted to be honest about it all. and to say to you mothers of 1,2,3 or more and expecting mothers you are awesome and i recognise all that you do in a day. all the behind the scenes jazz that is expected of you. you rock. 
and i will never judge your messy house, or your piles of washing, or your toast for dinner...because we all need a break.


so with that out...i am going to have a quiet think about things i can do to get my energy back in force. if you have any ideas or something that works for you feel mighty free to share! 
and the next time you have someone over don't freak about the pile of washing or the dishes in the sink...if anything it will make them feel more 'normal'...


i shall leave you with a picture of Honor at 11am still in her Pj's...being a Queen talking to one of her royal subjects i presume. because in her words "Queens are allowed to wear jarmies all day"....remember that.

peace out ya'll x